Jury Duty: From Inside the Jury Room

Months ago I got that dreaded notice in the mail that reminded me it had been way too long since I last got out of doing my civic duty. I had a good run with being excused because I was a nursing mother (another benefit of breastfeeding), but the court system no longer allows the have-to-watch-my-children excuse… at least not in Los Angeles County. Yep… on the measly $15 per day that they pay you, you actually will lose money doing jury duty if you have to pay for childcare. I’m not sure how they justify that, but it’s plainly ridiculous.

I postposed.

I thought I was being brilliant in postponing my jury week until Spring Break. I reasoned that at least I wouldn’t have to worry about childcare since my oldest girls would be able to stay home with the youngest. I was also banking on the fact that they probably wouldn’t call me in. What attorneys want to seat a jury during Spring Break, right? Wrong.

Here I am.

I contacted the court on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday and was told I wasn’t needed. Fabulous. Two more days to go and surely they wouldn’t want to drag me in on a Thursday or Friday. Wrong again. When I checked online (because if I don’t physically have to pick up a phone, I won’t), there it was… you are required to appear on Thursday. Oh for heaven’s sake!

At the ungodly hour of 8:15am I stood in line at the San Fernando Courthouse to march through the metal detector, along with other people who may or may not have been criminals. Unlike the airport security where they are kind of looking for people who are criminals, the court system actually kind of acts like we ALL are criminals. Before I even entered the building, I was barked at by law enforcement and told to remove my belt. Sheesh!

Once in the jury room (the woman in charge actually had the nerve to say this was OUR room and was designed just for US… personally, I would have chosen a warmer shade of paint and prettier carpeting) we all had to sit facing forward until we were told what to do. Remember being in Kindergarten and having the teacher explain (very slowly) her instructions? That’s exactly what this was like. I felt like I was 5 years old… or mentally handicapped… or both. I am a 49 year old mother of three with a college degree and a successful business and I was being told how to fill out a form and how to detach the juror badge from the paper it came in. OMG!

I’m thinking that if anyone in this room really needed to be spoon-fed how to do any of this then maybe they really shouldn’t be serving on a jury that held someone’s life in their hands? I almost felt sorry for the criminals. Almost. Not really.

There is a shelf in the corner of the room with jigsaw puzzles and games. Really? Am I going to be here long enough to do a jigsaw puzzle? Who am I going to play a game with? I haven’t uttered a word to anyone here except when another woman saw the Employee Only sign on the cafeteria and wondered what to do. “We ARE employees!” I told her and made a beeline for the coffee.

The real treat of the day came when they showed us a video of a bunch of jurors sharing their feelings on serving.

I really enjoyed getting to know everyone and participating in the American justice system.

This was so interesting to me to be a part of this.

I would love to do this again.

Are these people crazy? I’ve served on a jury trial and it was NOT fun. I did not make friends for life. All I wanted to do was to stay awake and get the hell out of there. When even the judge tells you that a case should never have come to trial, you know you are in trouble.

I get a lunch break from 12:00 - 1:30. I’m actually allowed to leave the building as well. The only problem is that I have to wait in line and go through security AGAIN. I guess my belt will be coming off for the second time today.

Despite the Jury Room Attendant (or whatever you call her… does she actually have a name?) repeatedly telling us that we WILL be here until 4:00 - 4:30pm today, I’m still kind of hoping that they will just send us all home after lunch. Hey, it happened to a friend of mine. Speaking of lunch… I hear there are tons of places to eat around the courthouse… but I absolutely hate eating alone in a restaurant. I didn’t plan for this. I should have had someone meet me for lunch.

The quiet is almost deafening. Nobody is speaking and really, the only sounds I can hear are my fingers typing away on my laptop. Oh yes, they let you bring a laptop into the jury room. And your cell phone, although they make it a point to let you know there is no cell service down here in the basement where the jury room is. At least they have free wifi… although don’t really plan on doing much internet surfing because I think they got a discount for some old dial-up service. sssslllloooowwww!!!!

Boring.

It’s definitely a great place to get some reading or writing done. (Hey, I’m writing aren’t I?). Most everyone else is checking their phone or reading. Or sleeping. Yep… there are several people with eyes closed, either fully out, or doing the tired nod - when you sort of fall asleep and then you kind of snap yourself out of it.

The best part (NOT) is the clock on the wall right dead center of the room. So you can watch the second hand tick around and around and pray that it speeds up at some point. It never does.

It’s only 11:20am.

At 11:30 we get notified from the Jury Room Woman (there’s got to be a specific name for that position) that we have all been called up because they are ready to seat a jury. UGH! It’s 11:30 and we’re supposed to go to lunch at noon. This can’t be right.

So we all truck up several floors to one of the courtrooms and wait outside in the hallway for about 10 minutes. Then, someone comes out and announces the Judge wants us all to go to lunch and come back at 1:45 (that’s 2 hours) because they are working on something that has to do with the case.

Hmmm… 2 hours. Yay for being able to go to lunch early. Boo for having to leave for 2 hours and COME BACK! Maybe they will settle the case or take a plea deal and we’ll all be excused… forever. Fingers crossed!

UPDATE:

I came back after lunch and sure enough we got called into the court. The Judge came in and explained that as soon as the “criminal” found out that they were ready to seat a jury for his case, he freaked out (my word, not hers) and decided to take a plea.

Soooo… we all got to go home. Jury service SERVED!

The End.