The good thing about getting older is that you tend to realize that the fears you’ve had all your life were kind of a waste of time. You spend so much time NOT doing things because you are scared of them that you miss out on some really amazing opportunities. Fear paralizes us and keeps us standing in the same spot… facing your fear and stepping out of that spot is what life is all about.
Many, many years ago when I was still working as an interior designer, I was asked by my company to speak at a local event. I have to say I am NOT a public speaker in any way. I would freeze up in school if I had to get in front of the class and talk. I was always the one in the background during a group presentation. I can do the work, I just don’t want to talk about it. I definitely let the fear get the best of me.
What was I afraid of? I don’t know… maybe of not having anything to say in front of a crowd, maybe of stumbling over my words, maybe of people getting up in the middle and walking away. I think what I was scared of the most was that people would think less of me… that they would think, “Who is this woman? She doesn’t know anything.”
So I decided to face the fear and I said yes to the speaking engagement. I was going to speak about budget design trends and how people could decorate without spending a ton of money. This was a topic I knew well… really well. I had been helping people decorate their homes on a budget for a long time. I knew my stuff.
And then when I got to the event, I realized I was speaking AFTER a reality show celebrity designer.
Are you kidding me????
How could I possibly top that? Well, I couldn’t.
Actually, it wasn’t that I couldn’t… it was that I was completely unprepared to. This was my first speaking engagement EVER and I had no idea what to expect. It was a disaster. I gave my semi-prepared speech and then I asked for questions. Silence. Seriously, you could hear crickets. I started to sweat… heavily. What to do?
Luckily, one wonderful, amazing, life-saving woman stood up and asked me a question. Yes! I can answer questions. I’m really good at that. One question led to another and I was more than a little relieved. But really… I couldn’t wait to get out there fast enough.
It was YEARS before I even considered speaking in public again. But I did.
What I realized was that I was scared because I was completely unprepared. I didn’t go through all the scenarios that could happen. I didn’t expect at all that someone more popular than me would be speaking before me. I didn’t plan for the silence or the lack of questions. I should have had my stuff together more. Should have… would have… could have…
Years later, I was asked to speak again at a blog conference. Yikes! Those fears started hitting me again. But I knew that if I never tried again, I would NEVER be asked again. And I also knew that I had valuable information to share. I took the big step and said yes. Holy cow… what did I do?
This time was different. This time I was prepared. Because this time I didn’t have the fear behind me, I was excited, looking forward to it actually. This time I knew that it was now or never. I either take the big step outside the box again or stay inside it forever.
I Jumped!
And it wasn’t horrible. In fact, it was FUN! I actually enjoyed sharing my knowledge with others… and I think they enjoyed it too. And the funny thing is… once I started enjoying it, I wanted to do more of it.
I still haven’t gotten to the point where I can stand up in front of a crowd and give an hour long presentation. That will come… but that’s another whole fear I need to get over. Meanwhile, I’m excited to be speaking at two upcoming blog conferences:
The Lifestyle Bloggers Conference in Los Angeles, California - February 19 - 22, 2015
Panel: Build a Career From/With Your Blog
AND
The ConnectHER Conference in San Diego, July 26, 2015
Round Table Discussion: Using Your Blog to Build a Career
I hope if you are a new blogger, a seasoned blogger, or are thinking about becoming a blogger… you’ll join me so I can see some friendly faces in the crowd. And ask me questions… lots of questions so I don’t stand there looking like a deer in headlights.
You go girl; I’ll be out there in the audience cheering you on!
Thanks, Ann.