It’s not even 9am and already I’ve had the day from hell.

Veteran’s Day. The kids have off from school. David wakes up early to go to work and forgets to turn the alarm clock off. Because “I” do not need to wake up at 6:15 AM today. But… “I” end up waking up at precisely 6:15 AM and I am NOT happy about it.

So I figure that since I’m up I might as well get on the computer and do some work. I am not alone. Lauryn ends up crawling in bed with me after sleeping all night on my floor. Wonderful. If she just went back to sleep that would be fabulous. But, no. She ends up whining and complaining. As usual. NOT getting any happier.

David manages to get out of the house for work and as I’m getting ready to get in the shower the phone rings. It’s David. He’s not happy. He stopped at the bank to get some cash and his car won’t start. Fabulous. Wonderful morning.

Sooooo…. I have to throw on some clothes and grab my keys and go bring him MY car to use to get to work. And now I’m going to be stuck with a dead car and a houseful of kids home from school. Great!

I get to the bank and David moves his equipment over to my car and leaves me sitting in a dead car in an empty parking lot waiting for AAA. We have no idea what is wrong with the car but NO I am not going to have it towed to the Valley (there is no local Volvo dealership) and sit there for hours upon hours while they try and figure out what is wrong with it. It’s cold. I have to go to the bathroom. It’s only 8am and nothing is open yet. I could walk to Starbucks but then what if I miss AAA? I sit.

Luckily, AAA is on their game and they get there pretty quickly. But they bring a van, not a tow truck. Crap.

The battery is dead. Completely. They jump it so I can at least drive home but there isn’t any guarantee that the car will start up again. I’m driving home instead of taking it to be replaced because a) I’m not even showered and dressed properly, and b) I don’t wanna!

I drive home. In the middle of me driving home, I get a call from home. I put it on speaker (because I don’t answer phone calls while I’m driving) and it’s Temera screaming “Jazz is throwing up all over the place!” Oh yes… because my day isn’t going badly enough.

Now I have screaming kids and a sick dog. Did I mention I wasn’t happy?

So I get home and back the car into the garage in case it needs to be jumped again.

I race in the house to find Temera outside with the dog and puddles of throw up all over the floor. Meanwhile, Amanda is sitting at the kitchen table writing on a piece of paper. Ummm… Amanda, do you think you could help clean this mess up?

“I don’t know how”, she whines. Oh yes, that’s my Mandy.

So we get the dog settled and the mess cleaned up and I am hoping I can finally get in a hot shower. Nope. It keeps getting better.

Suddenly, I’m hearing screaming from Amanda and Lauryn in the kitchen. They are fighting over cereal. CEREAL! Lousy, crappy, sugar-laden breakfast cereal. So I go into the kitchen just as Amanda is pulling the Frosted Flakes out of the cabinet… UPSIDE DOWN! And what do you know… it spills all over the kitchen floor! Unbelievable! Now you know why the dog gets sick all the time! He runs over to lap up the sugar.

This is my life. Who the hell said that 11-11-11 was lucky? Maybe in Vegas but certainly NOT in my house!