Since BlogHer 2012 I’ve had all kinds of crazy thoughts rolling around in my head. Some I sifted through, realized they were not really crazy, just stupid, and I threw them out. The really crazy ones remained, however, and I’m sitting here wondering what I’m supposed to do with all the crazy. Because they just aren’t crazy… they are downright scary.
So I’m left with the crazy, scary thoughts and I kind of want to throw them away too, but I can’t. They won’t leave me. And it’s kind of making me crazy!
I opened my email this morning and this is what I saw…
A blog post from The Daily Love titled “If you’re doing it right, you are going to be totally scared!” Holy Shit! Did this guy just read my mind?
I’ve been struggling lately with the direction I want to go. Do I want to keep blogging? Do I want to take it in a different direction? Do I feel like I’m not being completely fulfilled with what I’m doing? Do I have other ideas? The answer to all is YES. But it’s scary. Does that mean I’m doing it right? Or does it mean I have no idea what I’m doing? Probably both.
I’m trying to solidify some ideas and I have no idea what direction they will lead me in. I just know that if I don’t try, where does that leave me? Pretty much nowhere. I think we all get to a point where we have to take a chance, jump off the cliff and see if we drop or fly. And sometimes we drop so low to the point where we think we’re going to crash but at the very last minute we start to soar. I know… I’m getting all philosophical. Stop it!
Here’s what I know.
I need something more.
I don’t know yet what that means.
I have to find out.
I’ll be starting today. Because if I don’t start today, I’ll kick myself tomorrow for not giving myself a head start on something that could be kind of crazy. And scary. And wonderful.